Watershed Maria: I Am An Addict
My name is Maria and I am an addict. I am also an alumnus of The Watershed and currently an employee. Whoa, that is exciting to say. For the first time in my life, I have made a commitment to others and myself. I have taken suggestions and am sticking around long enough to get to know myself while living in a healthy sober environment. This is defiantly not the Maria you would have met almost two years ago. Here it goes.
What It Was Like
The way that it was like before, well went sort of like this. To start I was a huge liar. I lied to anyone that would listen. I also was filled with fear, selfishness, and self-centeredness. Everything was always about me. If you weren’t going to throw a pity party with me then I would have one for myself. I started using drugs and alcohol heavy at the age of 14-19 to some it may seem short. This was enough time for me to hit and emotional bottom and I wouldn’t wish upon anyone if you have been there you know what I mean. I physically could not stop using drugs and drinking no matter how many times I told myself I wouldn’t I always did. I hurt many people and myself as well. In July 2011, I admitted that I could not stop getting high & drunk to my parents. That was hard because “Maria” would never admit defeat. No not me. Something came over me and I admitted for the first time that I was an opiate addict who couldn’t put the needle down, someone who would take any amount of “molly” (Ecstasy-MDMA) and drink like a sailor. I admitted that I was slowly killing myself.
What happened while I was at The Watershed in Boynton Beach, FL? I don’t remember much of my detox except for the fact that I was treated with respect and I know that the nurses and therapist worked there butts off to make sure everything went over smoothly. We had a ton of groups. What stood out to me the most was that people would come in from H&I (Hospitals and Institutions Committee) that shared their stories, and I related. They seemed happier than I was so I listened they talked about a 12-step fellowship. I then moved to TWA (The Watershed Apartments) and had roommates and I thought that we would all get clean and sober together. Little did I know that it would not happen that way. While I was at TWA we went to PHP (Partial Hospitalization Program) where again I had a therapist and we went to more groups. In September they told me that I was being discharged, I went into an uproar. Really I was scared to leave I had become complaisant. I made a decision to attend IOP (Intensive Outpatient Program) and told me that I would be able to be discharged to TWR (The Watershed Residence). So I kept my mouth shut and did it. When I first moved over to TWR there were only 17 residents. I grew as The Watershed Residence grew. I was told to get a job, go to meetings, and get a sponsor. So I did. I did not do everything perfect but I kept trying. I was later moved to the Halfway House Sober Living Apartments and then I moved to the ¾ Way House where I stayed for the next 12 months. I got super involved in a 12 step fellowship, was consistent with a sponsor, and speaking with sober supports.
What It’s Like Now
What is life like today? Let me tell you awesome and you know why because even when it’s not I have tools to keep moving forward. I currently live in the new Watershed Sober Living Apartments where you need a year or more sober to stay there. I also was hired as a Social Media Specialist for The Watershed! Wow. Today I am able to be accountable to others and myself. I don’t live my life in fear. I do not lie to others there is no need to cause harm to others. I have a higher power that I rely on. This has helped me tremendously. I would honestly recommend anyone to this facility. Sobriety is what we make it. We can either hold on to the past and feel sorry for ourselves or move on and accept. No one is going to jump into my body and live my life for me. It’s up to me and remaining teachable. I don’t know everything nor have all the answers to life. The whole staff has worked with me through hard and good times and has done nothing but support me. Not because I’m special in any way but because I want better for myself and I life people see that. You can do it too! I’ve had ups and downs here at The Watershed but no matter what I didn’t pick up and stayed consistent in one place.
Clean & Sober since 11/22/2011
Check out others in recovery before & after images: #changeisgood
Read Watershed Ashling’s Story here.
Read Watershed Jamie’s Story here.
Read Watershed Laura’s Story here.