“In a world where you can be anything… be yourself!”
Most of my life growing up was spent trying to be someone else. I had fire red hair, I was short, had extremely pale skin with freckles, and I lived in Florida. I was a sitting target to say the least. I wanted so badly to be anyone else. I would spend years dressing up in various looks in hopes that I would fit in and be accepted.
In High School I tried dressing like a “freak”. I wore baggy pants, colored my hair, and had every funky kind of jewelry you could imagine. I figure if I rejected myself, you couldn’t reject me, and so I was teased even more. Drinking would start to take on a more important role before going off to college. At least with a drink I could drown out the noise.
Once I went to college I decided I could be the ideal Barbie image, and so I did. I dyed my hair blonde, tanned my skin, and wore very trendy clothes. The only problem was that I still wasn’t very uncomfortable in my skin. I just didn’t feel like I fit in anywhere, and drinking would help drown out that noise, too. The more I drank the more comfortable I felt around people and even around myself. I would carry on being someone else for years and yet still always felt lost, alone, and rejected.
Once I came into recovery I slowly started to find out who I was – the real me. I no longer dressed to impress or even tried to be someone I wasn’t. Don’t get me wrong, I still do my hair, put makeup on, and like to wear clothes that look nice, but I don’t strive to be someone else. I love the woman I have become, both inside and out, and I love just being me. I love that I move to a different beat than most people; I love my energy and bubbly talkative nature. I love that I am authentic and genuine and that I wear my heart on my sleeve. I love that I am sensitive and share my emotions openly without fear of what you will think of me. I love me because today I accept me for exactly who I am. I feel blessed for the beautiful life I have today and to be honest, I feel blessed to be a recovered alcoholic, too. Without going through the struggle and recovery that I have, I never would have had the courage to be the amazing person I am today.
I challenge you to be you, too! I challenge you to be the beautiful person that you were always meant to be. You are amazing both inside and out, and the world is missing out by you not sharing that.
Just for today, be you – exactly you!
Written By: Watershed AshlingTags: keep calm, motivation monday, motivational monday, Watershed Ashling